《衬衫领子》，1848 年

the Shirt-collar, 1848

从前有一位讲究的绅士，他除了别的东西之外，还有一个脱靴器和一把梳子；但他还有世上最精致的衬衫领子，关于这个领子，我们马上就要听一个故事了。

there was once a fine gentleman who possessed among other things a boot-jack and a hair-brush; but he had also the finest shirt-collar in the world, and of this collar we are about to hear a story.

这个领子已经很旧了，以至于他开始考虑结婚的事；有一天，他碰巧和一条袜带在同一个洗衣盆里。

the collar had bee so old that he began to think about getting married; and one day he happened to find himself in the same washing-tub as a garter.

“说真的，” 衬衫领子说，“我以前从没见过这么纤细、这么精致、这么整洁、这么柔软的东西。我可以冒昧地问一下你的名字吗？”

“Upon my word,” said the shirt-collar, “I have never seen anything so slim and delicate, so neat and soft before. may I venture to ask your name?”

“我不会告诉你的。” 袜带回答道。

“I shall not tell you,” replied the garter.

“你在家的时候住在哪儿呢？” 衬衫领子问道。但袜带生性害羞，不知道该怎么回答这样的问题。

“where do you reside when you are at home?” asked the shirt-collar. but the garter was naturally shy, and did not know how to answer such a question.

“我猜你是一条腰带，” 衬衫领子说，“一种衬腰带。我看出来了，我的小女士，你既实用又美观。”

“I presume you are a girdle,” said the shirt-collar, “a sort of under girdle. I see that you are useful, as well as ornamental, my little lady.”

“你别和我说话，” 袜带说，“我觉得我可没给过你这样做的任何鼓励。”

“You must not speak to me,” said the garter; “I do not think I have been given you any encouragement to do so.”

“哦，当一个人长得像你这么漂亮的时候，” 衬衫领子说，“这难道还不够鼓励吗？”

“oh, when any one is as beautiful as you are,” said the shirt-collar, “is not that encouragement enough?”

“走开；别靠我这么近，” 袜带说，“在我看来，你就跟个男人似的。”

“Get away; don’t e so near me,” said the garter, “you appear to me quite like a man.”

“我当然是一位讲究的绅士，” 衬衫领子说，“我有一个脱靴器和一把梳子。” 这不是真的，因为这些东西是他主人的；但他是个爱吹牛的家伙。

“I am a fine gentleman certainly,” said the shirt-collar, “I possess a boot-jack and a hair-brush.” this was not true, for these things belonged to his master; but he was a boaster.

“别靠我这么近，” 袜带说，“我不习惯这样。”

“don’t e so near me,” said the garter; “I am no accustomed to it.”

“装腔作势！” 衬衫领子说。

“Affectation!” said the shirt-collar.

然后它们从洗衣盆里被拿了出来，上了浆，挂在椅子上晒在阳光下，接着又被放在熨衣板上。

then they were taken out of the wash-tub, starched, and hung over a chair in the sunshine, and then laid on the ironing-board.

现在烧热的熨斗来了。

And now came the glowing iron.

“寡妇夫人，” 衬衫领子说，“小寡妇夫人，我觉得好暖和呀。我在变化，我所有的褶子都没了。你在我身上烫出个洞了。哎呀！我向你求婚。”

“mistress widow,” said the shirt-collar, “little mistress widow, I feel quite warm. I am changing, I am losing all my creases. You are burning a hole in me. Ugh! I propose to you.”

“你这块破布，” 熨斗骄傲地在领子上压过，因为她自认为是一台蒸汽机，在铁轨上行驶并拉着车厢。“你这块破布！” 她说。

“You old rag,” said the flat-iron, driving proudly over the collar, for she fancied herself a steam-engine, which rolls over the railway and draws carriages. “You old rag!” said she.